I know, I know, I’m really late. Most people think of their resolutions and goals for the new year towards the end of the year. Just because I’m late posting, doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about it for some time. I just feel the need to put this out there, kind of as a way for me to document and declare how it is I’m going into this year, that way I can remind myself when things get rough, like they are right now.
Having a birthday towards the beginning of the year also means I get to not only think about the year in general, but about my personal year, my life, and future. As the years have been going by, there have been different reactions and different ways of looking ahead. I’m fully aware that I’m not getting any younger, but honestly, most days, I don’t really feel my age just yet. I’m hoping that’s a good thing. We are, after all, only as old as we feel, right?
Looking back over last year, there’s one thing that stands out. Nothing went the way I had planned. I had made goals, I had made resolutions, I had made plans, they basically all had to be put to the side for another time or given up altogether. So it can be understood that I’m aprehensive about making new goals or any long-term plans, as things aren’t all that much clearer at this point.
Even though things didn’t work out the way I had planned, looking back, I can see there was a plan in it all. I would have never chosen to move with the kids back to Germany, open a flat here, or even stay past the warm summer months. I wouldn’t have chosen to send my kids to public school, I’m an educator and love homeschooling, after all!
But, looking back, this is a good plan, too. My kids did need the incentive to learn German, and how better to do that than in a German school. I had some papers that I needed to work on, which I now have the opportunity to complete. There are other personal reasons why I can be happy I’m “stuck” here for now.
So getting into the new year, maybe I just won’t make any long-term plans or resolutions. Instead, I’m just putting my hand into God’s again and trusting Him to lead. And when it gets foggy, as it is right now, I’ll just lean closer and trust that He knows where He’s leading, and in the end, it’ll all be alright.